A very important part of planning for the aging process is a realistic evaluation of the current housing situation. When elderly or disabled people try to live in an unsuitable environment, inevitably a crisis or major safety issue can arise. It can also lead to an unnecessary nursing home admission if there is a sudden change in health or ability to function in that environment. This might include a home with a lot of stairs, laundry in the basement, doorways that are too narrow to fit a walker or wheelchair or with parking outdoors, which can be dangerous if you live in an area where there is snow or ice.

I have worked with many people struggling to help their parents make a transition to a different housing arrangement. Often this is to an assisted living facility. It is very important to visit several facilities in your area so that you can have a basis of comparison. If there are any cognitive issues or dementia, it is very important to find a facility that has a memory care or cognitive program. Not all assisted living facilities have this and it will ensure that another move will not be needed. I am always trying to stay one step ahead by thinking about what will likely come next in the aging or disease process. So try to find a place that can handle the next stages your parents might need in terms of care. Assisted living is a great option for people who enjoy socializing and want to be in an environment where there are meals and the support of staff who can help with personal care and medical oversight.

If assisted living is not affordable and there is a risk of outliving the financial assets, then even more planning is needed because you should be looking into affordable housing options for seniors. Most low-income HUD housing for seniors have wait lists of several years. If you contact your town or city social services department you should be able to obtain information about this option. But the key is to be able to recognize that this is where you are probably headed so you will have this option down the road. It cannot hurt to fill out an application to get on a wait list. Eligibility is based on income and assets, and the rent, if you do move into this type of housing, is based on a percentage of your income. Some senior housing complexes have social activities and meals, and others do not.

Resistance to moving is a real challenge. I have found that timing is very important when trying to orchestrate this transition. Sometimes you have to wait for a health crisis to make it happen. I am currently working with a couple in their late 80s who have resisted moving out of their home for years. They are now receptive because one has Alzheimer’s disease that has progressed to the point where the spouse is feeling overwhelmed and anxious. Now she can see the value of living closer to family, in a supportive environment with specially trained staff, and not having to manage the upkeep of a house. A geriatric care manager has the specialized expertise to help you through situations where the resistance is great, safety is an issue and the process seems totally overwhelming.